Shea Counseling

Depression

noreply@blogger.com (Shea Counseling) — Mon, 20 Sep 2010 21:30:00 +0000

Do you ever feel like sometimes this world is really hard to live in?

You spend your day running here and running there, to find yourself laying in bed at the end of the day saying, "why?"

Why do things seem so hard? Why do I feel so much pain and sadness? Why doesn't anyone understand? Why am I always tired?

You might say, "I feel like giving up! I want to quit!" Then you cry from the emptiness and hope to fall asleep at a decent hour.

Depression is an ugly entity. It can take over like an enormous, black cloud and literally squash out any feelings of joy. Then, it moves on to it's next victim leaving behind a cold, lonely blanket of emptiness. Next, comes the thoughts, "I am so miserable, I am worthless, I am not good enough, I am unloved.... and on and on... The thoughts continue until you spiral downward and hit bottom. Sometimes you can bring yourself back up for brief moments, but you can still sense the cloud's presence. It wont go away.

Depression can hit at different times throughout our lives. Sometimes we have a trauma or an event that triggers it. Other times it is a battle that continues to pop up throughout various times in life.
I want to tell you that there is hope! Depression is something that happens to you. It is not who you are! There are many ways to get relief from depression. It is possible to get rid of that nasty cloud of black doom.

If you are experiencing this much pain, I encourage you to reach out and ask for help! You do not have to suffer, quietly alone!
Reach out! There is hope!

Anger

noreply@blogger.com (Shea Counseling) — Fri, 17 Sep 2010 23:31:00 +0000

Often times we don’t realize that behind most anger is passion. Passion for an idea, feeling, thought, action….

You might get fired up when things don’t start to happen the way you would like them to and then anger sets in. Most of us have heard that it is not the feeling of anger that is “bad” but the way we handle it.

Are you a person who gets angry and begins yelling, cussing, hitting or throwing a mini tantrum…?

Or, are you a person who gets angry and knows how to communicate what you are fired up about without causing pain to others? Can you get angry without creating an atmosphere of chaos and disconnect with those around you? These behaviors are what turns most people away. They can cause the most grief after our “mini tantrum” is over.

So what can you do instead? How do you acknowledge the presence of anger and handle it, without creating chaos, pain or distance to those around you?

My question for you is... "what is behind your anger?" "What are you really passionate about that causes you to get so fired up?"

When you find the source of those answers, dealing with your anger takes on a different meaning.

I challenge you to learn how to get fired up and fight for your dreams in a way that doesn’t turn people away, cause a disconnect between the people you are around or sets the stage for others to become defensive.

Transitions

noreply@blogger.com (Shea Counseling) — Wed, 01 Sep 2010 04:41:00 +0000

Transitions can be an uncomfortable place to be. They hold fear of what is to come or not to come and sadness of what will no longer be. There may be excitement towards the new adventure, yet anxiety about what will be lost. How do you let go of what you know in your heart of hearts needs to happen, yet feel panic at the loss of it? As I am still struggling with that answer myself, I have found some peace in trusting in something greater than myself…. But even this is extremely hard to do… sometimes we choose to keep spinning in what we know needs to change until we are so exhausted we have no choice but to change it….

Although, somehow, we might still find the energy to hold on, when what we really need to do is just let go!

What are you holding on to that your heart is saying, “just let go?”

(Guilt, anger, resentment, pain, a job, a friendship?)

Control

noreply@blogger.com (Shea Counseling) — Mon, 16 Aug 2010 23:28:00 +0000

Have you ever wondered why we try so hard to be in control? Controlling every little thing we can. Constantly racing against the clock to complete this task or that task. Controlling how much time our spouses help out, whether items are put back in the right place….

Seeking control, taking control, losing control…

I was reminded today that WE really aren’t in control. We don’t have control over anything… I sure take great strides at attempting to prevent the undesirable. But that is all it is… “an attempt.” I can drive as careful as possible, but a car accident may still happen. I can give my kids all the right food and wash their hands incessantly, but they may still get sick. I can nag until I am blue in the face to have the house look the way I desire, but will get messy.

The point… Life is going to happen the way it wants to. Or as some believe, the way it is suppose to. Life is short. Every day matters! I realize this is not a new revelation… but one I think is so easy to forget. Or perhaps, one I spend so much time attempting to forget… maybe that is why the illusion of control is so powerful. Maybe that is why it consumes so much time.

What would all your energy and time go into if you chose to stop being consumed by your attempts to control?

Where is your energy better spent today?

To-do list

noreply@blogger.com (Shea Counseling) — Mon, 09 Aug 2010 19:50:00 +0000

Do you ever find that you have more on your to-do list than you know what to do with?

I have this really bad habit of making to-do lists, in all my spare time, yet when it is complete, it is often so daunting, that I simply end up walking away. I become anxious and frozen… I don’t know where to start. I tell my clients, “Take 1 item at a time, prioritize the list according to importance, and ask yourself, “What do I actually HAVE to get done today?” … Great advice I know! :> And, when I remind myself of these things, they often work. Yet, the list grows and grows and grows… I cross one thing off and five more items appear. I know it is too much to ask for a life without a to-do list!

So, today I experimented and put my to-do list on hold. I knew it would be there waiting for me tomorrow… but today, I only did one thing. I played with my kids. Nope nothing else… no laundry, no work, no emails, no phone calls, no yard work, no cleaning up… nothing, except letting my kids decide what they wanted to do and giving them my full attention. And when my mind would try to sneak away to think about my to-do list, I would pull it back to focus on the only thing that mattered today… giving my kids - ALL OF ME!

What would happen, if you put your to-do list on hold, for just one day?
What needs - ALL OF YOU?